I can’t believe how many years have passed since I lost my mother, and every year at this time, I take some time to remember her. Sure I do a bit of crying, it’s perfectly natural. I think it makes up for why I didn’t cry when I initially found out she passed away. It must of been shock, that is really the only explanation I have. I think my shock started before she actually passed away, I was in denial. It took me a little over a year before I actually started to cry. I guess my soul finally came to terms that she was gone. What a horrible feeling. Well I don’t want this post to be all sad and stuff.
Remembering someone you have lost should not only be sadness but happiness that they are in a place much better than us. That’s if you believe in Heaven, which I do I know she is in Heaven, and she is no longer in the pain she was when she was with us. My mom went through a lot in her life, from losing her mother when she was only a child, to losing one of her own children when she was young. She has lived so much, in such a short amount of time. I lost her 11 years ago, the moment I found out she passed is etched in my memory forever. The last time I seen her will never escape my memory either. Oh how I miss her, how I wish she was still her, but that is my own selfishness that wants her to be here. I miss her laugh, her smile, her smell. I just miss her ?
Well there isn’t much to say today. I have to admit when I woke this morning, I didn’t remember it was her birthday, I hate mornings like that, not remembering things, but then it hit me, and I knew it was mom reminding me lol. I know it’s silly but that’s how I see it. I asked my William to drop by and pick up a candle on his way home, I completely forgot to ask him earlier in the week, although today is only Wednesday lol. I always burn a candle for her on her birthday, the day she passed, and on Christmas. I can’t tell you how much I miss her, it hurts so much! I just need my time to cry. I’ll be okay, it’s just part of nature.
I made a short video of a few nice quotes I found on the internet, full credit goes to the makers. I miss my mom, no one will ever know how lonely that makes me feel. But I also have a lot of very nice memories, and things that make me giggle that remind me of her. I love you mom, and miss you so very much! That’s all for today everyone, have a blessed week.